5 Tested Facts to Attracting the Right People in Your life
Even if you feel timid
Life is in phases and it ties the progression in life to dynamic day-to-day influences. These changes with time affect our whole being, and these progressions happen within a space of time.
If you have some personal assessment of your life in the past years, you would have noticed that a lot of things had changed about you. Not just as regards to physical growth, but also your style tastes and aspirations.
Twenty something years back, I wanted to be a Medical Doctor as a young child growing up in an environment with poor health care system. The way I saw people suffer to access health care services melted my heart, and I made a vow (I thought) that I was going to be a Medical Doctor.
I nurtured this feeling for a long time until I discovered I could not stand the sight of sick patients and the worse of it would be anything that has to cause blood to come out. I was and am usually terrified.
When I discovered my imagined medical sojourn was a failed plan, I resorted to thinking I was going to be a Computer Engineer, because of my recent flare for computers.
And that was how these imagined careers never actually came to be before I turned fourteen.
There are usually no pre-planned results of what we become. It is all tied to the tiny lines of what we see, which of it influences our thought, what we work towards and finally what becomes our reality.
Our reality is a key thing to what we eventually get out of life.
To a large extent, the quality of what we get from life is because of the people we meet in life. They make us to aspire and desire.
I once imagined attaining the status of someone; this spurred me to study about this said person’s lifestyle; his pros and cons and his influence.
There wouldn’t be need to dream if there were no people to look up to as a fuel to that dream.
It is our daily interaction with people and situations that affects both our short- and long-term decisions. By the way, a high level of our situations are still caused or tied around humans.
That is why the people you meet and also allow to have a place in your life are important and matters a lot.
I tie the enormous challenge to this question, “how do I attract the right people that I need?”
And situation of dilemma is when you feel you are the sound person among many people of various inclinations.
But few questions come to mind, helping us really tell what our state usually is. They are;
· How do I know that I am not with the right person(s)?
· What would I do when I discover I am in a wrong zone?
· And how do I attract the right persons to my life?
As regular or familiar as these few questions are, if not given the right answer with a right approach, they would always be a lag to our keys to attracting the people we really need either to advance in our career, get a business partner or start up a new relationship. And understanding how to manage those that can cause our personal goals to lag.
Question 1: How do I know that I am not with the right person(s)?
Well, I tie the answer to this question to your feelings and instincts. You wake up every day with something ringing in your head, “this person I am engaged with is not the right person for me.”
Some of your behavioral experience starts from you being uncomfortable around the person, often feeling threatened when the person is around and becoming overly concerned with what you say, and/or contribute during a discussion.
All these feelings and attitude consciousness would only lead you to one direction, “EMMOTIONAL STRESS.”
When your condition is resulting to an Emotional Stress among the people you are with and no one is spotting your mood to ask you, “Hey, what is the problem?”
Then you are obviously with the wrong people and your time journey would definitely be difficult if not aborted if you continued to stay with this people.
Sometimes, we didn’t really choose this person or people. Most often they were people who happen to either be family or perhaps colleague(s).
My suggestion:
Avoiding them without a fight is the best option if you can. And when you cannot avoid them, avoid those conversations that may bring misunderstandings and behaviors they would question.
Why I recommend this would be because, no matter your bond to them, they would not always be around at all times or for life.
Approach it with a mindset of a ‘temporal challenge’.
“We can’t control everything that happens to us, but we can control how we respond to things we can’t control.” — Avis J. Williams
Question 2: What would I do when I discover I am in a wrong zone?
First, we need to know what I call a ‘WRONG ZONE’ in this context.
Any location you are in that does not make you dream, where you do not aspire to do more or get better and that does not give you an opportunity to meet people who can substantially appreciate what you are doing or who you are, is a wrong zone.
It usually takes a lot of time to come to terms you have been in a wrong zone all the while. And why is it so?
It is because it usually is a place you have been so familiar with and often think it’s the safest place for you. Where you think you have minimal risks not knowing you are embarking on self destruction.
The slogan for wrong zone is ‘Comfort!’ ‘Comfort!!’ ‘Comfort!!!’
My suggestion:
The wrong zone can never leave you, but you may choose to leave the wrong zone — the best decision.
Another daisy way with the wrong zone is to choose to accept and do things differently while you try to negotiate your exit.
I would never recommend your being there. Find a place where similar energy and ideas are shared to avoid you burning out.
Question 3: And how do I attract the right persons to my life?
This third question is the last and a key question. While approaching it, I would show you tips to attract the right persons irrespective of where you are. As I am quite certain that they are the reasons behind your curiosity in this post.
I discovered them, have applied them, and it works and is still working for me.
#1. Be Prepared
There is nothing you can attract without being prepared for it. Being prepared reflects in the mindset that you are ready for responsibility, which means taking the action(s) required.
That is the attitude of someone who is prepared to be a people’s magnet — not just anyone but the right ones.
· Just say to you, “I desire the right people and they would come now or later, but it won’t be long.”
· Think about the ‘why’ behind meeting those people you would wish to meet.
· Meditate on the people you want to attract.
· Be excited!
As simple as these four steps mentioned are, they prepare you both consciously and subconsciously to get those right persons into your life.
#2. Speak their language
You may ask, “What has language got to do with getting the right people my way?”
But I am going to show you how a simple conversation between me and my friend made me to understand that language is key to getting the right people your way.
I and Elvis took a walk after our engagement on one of the Saturdays we were to work together.
I shared how I was turned down in the several proposals I made to some car dealers as regards my intending affiliate partnerships.
Prior before that discussion, many car dealers I had met would barely want me to get to the key point because I would always start with, “I have a proposal for you…” and that would be the end before the journey ever began.
Elvis took me to another lane of thought.
He said to me, “These people meet many people in the day and many come without really having their interests at heart but because of what they intend getting out of them. Instead of saying ‘I have a proposal,’ I better put it this way, ‘If I bring a deal of about $10,000 to you, how much would be my commission?’”
That is same statement said in another way. And guess what, that was the key I have been looking for.
If you want to attract people rightly, always approach them from the point of their interest and not what you think is right for them. What is that bait to catch them?
Before you decide to engage those people, you feel had influenced your life or that you are attracted to in a special way, maybe from afar, be prepared always. Make sure you have learnt much about them so that whenever the opportunity shows itself, you could speak their language and the language is that which must be of value and interest.
That would gain you wonderful audience and help you attract the right people that you would need.
#3. Watch your attitude
Mastering your words as explained in Rule #2 alone may make you attracted to a good number of right people, but it does not end with attracting them; you need to manage them and have them for a very long while.
Before I give you an insight to losing the right people to a poor attitude, let me also share that negative or bad attitude could cause you not to attract the people you need to have.
Our attitudes is the definition of who we are because it tells of what we will do in every situation. You may cover up your body defects, but you can never cover a careless attitude.
If you are someone that banks a lot on people’s mistakes/errors, you may find it difficult to attract the key people you need for the next leap. You always prejudge them, and that is a poor attitude to be watched and worked on.
The other side to negative or bad attitude starts from thinking that you don’t deserve something good, even the right people. Well, your solution is rule #1.
What you do in the presence of people tells a lot about your attitude, and it also portrays how far people can go with you.
Attitude sustains the attracting power, and that attitude would also tell if the attraction would become a good relationship.
As I have shown you what a negative or bad attitude could do to attraction, all you need do is to be cautious and watch, work or improve on your attitude.
#4. Be a friend
In extending the arm of friendship, you attract the right people. I would explain.
If you are ready to make friends, you attract people. People would experience calmness with the way you talk and behave, which would make them feel at home with you.
People should always experience peace and support with and around you. The peace and support in friendship are the keys to attracting the right people repeatedly.
Become a friend and see friends around you.
#5. Break into the zone
This is my last secret and the very powerful one — I am tempted to say it is the most powerful.
For you to see the right people of your dreams, you need to be in the right places where you can find them — they do not live in your imaginations.
Nature structured our system to have places that certain species survive and thrive.
Man naturally has adopted that pattern and set barriers to discourage some people who they might say do not meet the requirements to be part of certain groups.
The kinds of people you need to attract may not be resident in your own zone. What do you need to do? Go out and in there and look for them.
What happens when the people you need are in zones with high-level restriction to an entry? What if you cannot afford the registration to be a part of them?
This is my secret, you can go there too as an enthusiast, interested in what it requires to be a member or better still the goals or objectives of the organization, club, group or whatever place it might be.
While you do that, apply rule #4 — get a friend there. From time to time do a check on the person and share your ideas of what you think they can do to help grow the organization.
Another way to break that artificial barrier is to go as a volunteer. Offer to render pro Bono services to them where you can. I bet there are two things this move would do to you if you are successful.
First, it would expose you to professional and relational privileges the more and give you higher credentials than you have before you went out for them.
Then the second would be the platform to meet those right persons whom you have so thought about.
The value this would add for you would be more than the worth of what you would have been paid as their support staff. I know this because it has been my most used tool.
Pay for seminars and webinars, join sports clubs, join social clubs, sign up for career and professional associations, and then travel and explore the world. There are destiny keys attached in these activities.
Summarily, when you a spotted in these zones, they judge you as one of them and so you would become.
